Bangor, Maine, Police Department Just Sarcastically Scolded Our Highway Driving
"Good ole, TC."
Those were the three words (or I suppose two words and a couple of letters) spoken by a co-worker when I mentioned this immaculate, amazing, sarcastic Smackdown of a scolding on the Bangor Maine Police Department page on Facebook recently.
And it involves something we're clearly all passionate about, because we all address it either by complaining about it on social media almost every day, or we address it by simply laying on our horn and/or sticking one select finger on our hand out of our driver's side windows.
And honestly, for as many times as we've called out left lane campers in these articles or in other ways, this post by retired Bangor Police Lieutenant Tim Cotton (or TC, as he's more affectionally known) is just absolute gold. Because it calls out left lane campers in the most hilarious way -- while basically insulting all of us
I sometimes fail to signal. I'm asking for your prayers.
That's how he ended his post, but he started it off by basically giving us a "scolding" refresher on how to actually use the left lane, but he sweetly dumbed it down for us.
The left lane (passing lane) on the Interstate and Maine Turnpike is for the faster cars. Cars that are passing.
Author's Note: "Cars that are passing" made me legit LOL (and that's "laugh out loud" for those of you that think LOL is "lots of love.")
After randomly insulting Pennsylvania, the following line he dropped about left-lane drivers was magical, and one that a lot of us not only think about but also scream out of our windows while honking and one-finger saluting:
Yes, some people are speeding in that lane, but it's not your job to slow them down. Move to the right, and let those faster vehicles pass.
He also savagely came after our Aunt Barbara, but really, is he wrong?
Stay to the right until you get behind someone who drives like your Aunt Barbara. Then, signal and move out to the left to pass, returning to the travel lane after that pass.
Aunt Barbara jokes aside, he did drop a reminder for the left-lane speeders (while addressing the left-lane campers -- he really touched on everyone in this post.)
The speeders will be caught. Maybe not today. Maybe not this year. Actually, maybe they won't be caught; we don't know.
And don't worry, because like police officers get smack-talked for pulling people over for being on their phones while driving, meanwhile they're on entire laptops while driving -- he called he and fellow officers out while addressing using a blinker.
Yes, yes, I know you saw a cop last week who didn't signal. That's actually why I wrote this.
We truly don't deserve TC. He's an icon and should be beloved by all.
Except maybe your Aunt Barbara. That's understandable.