Today Is ‘Funnybone Friday’ So We Wanted To Hear Your Jokes
Full disclosure, we made up the concept of "Funnybone Friday" on the internet somewhere, you won't find it, hahaha. It hasn't caught on like Throwback Thursday or whatnot, but maybe soon? (We doubt it)
JStew: To me, it always comes back to the drummer jokes. I always think I've heard them all, but every now and then I'm surprised. But, let's take a look at a few of my favorites....What do you call a drummer who broke up with his girlfriend? Homeless!....How many drummers does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to do it, and ten more to tell you how Neil Peart would've done it better.....What do you call a drummer with half a brain? Gifted!.....What does a drummer use for birth control? Their perosnality!....What do you call a drummer in a suit? The defendant!....What do you do if you run over a drummer with your car? You back up!
I could go on for days probably. But still enjoy those gems, and feel free to insult the drummer in your life today.
Cori: There are a few jokes that really make me chuckle, most of them come from either my kids or my kid-nephews. For instance: Q: What has more lives than a cat? A: A frog, because it croaks every night. Or Q: What to you call an alligator wearing a vest? A: An in-vesti-gator. Or even Q: What does a baby computer call it's father? A: Data
I don't even care that they're super-cheesy. I love them! Hahahahaha
Your jokes are appropriately awful. Clean jokes are always the worst, which also makes them kind of the best. Let's see what you got...
Greg Miller What's it called when a cop pulls over a u- haul? Busting a move.
Lisa Gallant Q: What did one snowman say to the other snowman? A: Do you smell carrots? (Sorry I teach young children)
Shannon Denbow How do you make a tissue dance? Put a little boogie in it.
Aj Riseman What do you call a three legged cow? Lean beef
Shannon Denbow What did the Dalmatian say after lunch? "That hit the spot"
Mich Ouellette A three-legged dog walks into a saloon and says, "I'm lookin' for the man who shot my paw."
Tanya Kelly Why did the small mink coat salesman have to shave twice a day? Because he was a little furrier! (Thank you - I made that one up all by myself)
Mich Ouellette Two men walk into a bar on a hot day. One man says, "Give me a tall glass of H2O." He drinks it and feels refreshed. The other man says, "Yeah, I'll take a tall glass of H2O too." He drinks it and dies.
Lynn Hatch Sension How does a priest make Holy Water? He boils the Hell out of it.
Opie Helstrom My life
Jason Leone What's long and brown and sticky? A stick!
Jerret Condon A nun, a gorilla, and a one legged horse walk into a bar, bartender says... what is this some kind of joke?
Ed Porter What's the difference between a literalist and a kleptomaniac? A literalist takes things literally and a kleptomaniac takes things, literally.
Chris Soper Why didnt the toilet paper cross the road??? It got stuck in a crack
Allison Trainor Hopkins Knock knock. Whose there? To. To Who? Um, actually ...it's "to whom". It's a bad one but the Grammer junkies find it funny
Allison Trainor Hopkins A piece of string walked into a bar and ordered a drink. The bar tender said we don't serve string. Get out of my bar. So the string went outside and tied himself into a knot and pulled apart the top of the string at the top and went back into the bar. The bar tender said didn't I already tell you I don't serve string? And the string said, no, I'm a frayed knot.
Levi Huntley This guy walks into a bar......ouch
Bobbie Lindsey Do you want to hear a State of Maine construction joke? Sorry, I’m still working on it.
Nicholas Dargie Ever hear the one about a magician? He was driving down the road and turned into a driveway.
Scott Hanscom Two guys walk into a bar. Witch is really dumb. Once the first guy hit it, you would think the second guy would have saw it.
Jim Brown Blind man walks into a bar. (not the true joke). Sets down and orders a beer... asks the bar tender..... hey bartender. Wanna hear a blonde joke?? Bartender replies.... sir, I can see that you are blind but before you tell that joke.... I’d like to inform you that I’m a blonde... the lady beside you is blonde.... as well as the woman at the end of the bar...... you still wanna tell that joke..... Man replied..... NOT IF I GOTTA EXPLAIN 3 times
Tony Franciss What's worse than 911..….311.
Larry Rogers What did the janitor yell when he suddenly jumped out of the closet? "SUPPLIES!"