One Website Idiotically Describes the ‘Absolute Worst’ Thing About Maine

I spend way too much time on the internet.

Part of my job is to scour the internet looking for stuff. Over the years, it's made my cache of useless knowledge vast, yet I somehow have total recall over all these useless factoids. I'm always looking for something new to add to my list. I feel like at this point, you have to try pretty hard to present me with an odd fact about Maine I've never heard before.

In the never-ending quest for knowledge no one needs, I occasionally come across something unique. It always thrills me to the core. I especially get a thrill from finding out things that aren't necessarily negative, but I have to see how outrageous the info is. And the fact I was presented with today was, well... downright stupid.

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What do you think is Maine's 'worst' feature?

If you had to pick something that would represent the worst possible feature of Maine, what would it be? Our roads? Taxes? Someone at some point will naturally bring up politics... Really, there's probably no shortage of things that Mainers would tell you is wrong with Maine, at any given moment.

However, would you add a lack of places to land a helicopter among Maine's biggest issues? Does the lack of heliports threaten your way of life? Do you lie awake at night wondering how we could possibly land all those choppers flooding Maine skies?

Well, according to ExcellentTown.com, that is Maine's chief issue. Lack of heliports. Obviously, this was put together by the same people who wonder why Maine doesn't have a Red Lobster.

Were other state's issues just as dumb?

Not really. For instance, in Alaska they say one of the biggest problems are STD's. that actually does sound terrible. In California, the issue is pollution. Again, that seems reasonable. Florida leads the country in boat/water accidents. All these things are awful. But here in Maine? Nope. It's all about not being able to land your helicopter.

Almost every other entry on that list made sense in some way, except ours. I can't imagine what criteria went into determining that. Is it all the private helicopter owners in Maine? Did they band together to bring attention to this tragic oversight on Maine's part? All I know, is that we'd better get right on installing some heliports. Stat.

Here's some things about Maine that are actually true, despite how they sound.